humor: lawyers jokes

 

lawyers' lampoons

a man goes into a pet shop to buy a parrot. the shop owner points to three identical parrots on a perch and says, " the parrot on the left costs $500."

" why does it cost so much?" asks the man, incredulous.  the owner says, " well, the parrot knows how to do legal research."

the man then asks about the next parrot and is told that one costs a whooping $1000 because it can do everything the other parrot can do, plus it knows how to write a brief that will win any case in any court.

naturally, the increasingly startled man asks about the third parrot and is told that it costs $2000! he asks, " what can it do?"

" to be honest," the owner replies, " i have never seen it do a thing but the other two parrots call him Senior Partner."

-michael valetta, reader's digest, sept 2006

Humor: Registered RN

The most recent flood of immigrant families to the U.S.of A. has brought a situation where the husband had to settle for other menial tasks or be a full time 'houseband'.

The law in that country allows spouses and children to reside while the other spouse is gainfully employed as a nurse. Then after a certain period, qualify them for citizenship. Some two years or so after migrating.

A friend once joked to me that her hubby is also an RN. I answered, "why the hell is he staying at home?"

I immediately got a retort: "it's a private joke among us here in the hospital. RN is our code name for husbands who stay home. It stands for "REGISTERED NANNYS!" muhahaH!

This is specially funny in relation to Pinoy culture where most male spouses concept of an ideal wife is the stay-at-home-mom.

HUMOR: Tinuod Nga Botbot ( True Lies)

I came across a site last week and I decided to make post as a tribute to the brand of humor-dialect-culture that is Cebuano/Visayan.

One word that makes it so distinctive, expressive, and without par in the entire archipelago. The word means dark. In tagalog madilim. In the local dialect it goes 'ngit-ngiiit'!

One word says it all.

Kumusta diay sa akong mga parenti diha sa Cebu. Si Tiyo nako nga Vicente ug akong ig-agaw tagsa, si Ging-ging, usa ka matahum nga doktora. Ayaw gyud nag tinuntuhi ninyo ha? Dila ray way labud ninyo(j/k)!

***warning though, site contains explicit language. Click on image to go to site...